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Friday, December 30, 2011

Christmas in the BDH

This was our real first Christmas in the BDH, what is the BDH you ask.  That is my acronym for the Bigger Dream Home.  It really means big damn house that is eating me alive and that I will still be paying for when I am dead.  But let’s focus, yes we moved in on Christmas Eve of 2010, which made for a very exciting Christmas, so how do you top that; a house for Christmas.
I was planning a humble Christmas because of the huge expense of the house this past year, and I really wanted a “hallmark Christmas”.  You know the kind you see on TV that makes you secretly tear up, but you say “there was something in my eye”  One of those Christmas’s that involve enlightenment, peace on earth and of course everything coming together on Christmas morning.
I did however have the typical “Bigger” Christmas, no big surprises. Really after all these years this year were the first that we started a tradition, well we actually started last year; we went to the Chinese restaurant for Christmas dinner.  Not because our dog ate the turkey but because we thought we did it the first Christmas in the BDH so why not from now out.  I am not sure if it is funny or sad that it was the most exciting thing we did. 
I guess I should be grateful, we have survived this year, and grown, and been healthy.  But what a year it has been.  Bullshit, I will reflect at New Year’s, right now I am wondering why I didn’t get more presents because I am absolutely sure I deserved the world this past year. I guess this is where my son gets his dissatisfaction with his haul this year, not from the fact that he is so over indulged, but that he comes from my loins.

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

It is a lot harder to do….

Well, I fell off the face of the earth and now I am back, I was hoping I would come out of the gates like a race horse but I guess anger and spite got the best of me.  Winter is the hardest time for me anyway, so the added disappointment didn’t help.  I have to say after my last posting I was surprised how quickly everyone came to my support.  I received emails, texts and even an old friend dropped back into my life for a moment of support. 
So here I am now looking at the finish line that has approached so soon, that I was really frustrated that I couldn’t go back and do it again.  All I can say is yes ladies and gentles I made it to my goal. Of course I have to use the handicap I set for myself, but at this point I will take it as a win! So I will have to roll into 2012 with a plan to finish my goal. 
Let’s recap in this past year of ups and downs shall we?  I stared off realizing that I was shaped like a starfish, and that I not only needed to lose weight but I need to “bring my sexy back” by incorporating a Mantra, that didn’t stick very well.  I found out that “Nancy” (typically I hate people that refer to themselves in the third person, but in this situation I am totally okay with it) very much resembles a sumo wrestler in a white thong; so we have made the switch to boy shorts. We have come to the conclusion that the “balls to the wall” is not the best policy for me to follow.  Also; that my son has a touch of diarrhea mouth and has no filter.
Through this past year it has been a crazy journey and I have to say that I have made so many changes in my life that I have to look back and be proud of what I have done.  I rededicated my life to me and my family ( even though it was not hugely successful, it is the fact that I tried)  I restructured my work and gained new help.  I started a kick ass Man Hating club that meets once and month and is filled with some of the most amazing women; which more detail will be coming.  Not to mention the weight is better, and my health is better than it has even been.  I also made a promise to myself to take care for my entire debit in the next few years, and take that stress off my plate.  So here is to me….the fantastic fabulous, well dressed, charismatic, top shelf, individual I know. 
Now for setting the new goal, of course it will be to finish what I started, but I think I am going to through a twist on it.  This time it is for me, solely me.  I want to be able to look into the mirror; I want to be comfortable in my own skin again.  And if someone follows, so be it, and if he doesn’t so be that too! I will be requiring some help from you all of course.  Like a new Mantra, something to inspire me day after day.  Something I can scream from the roof top.  So I am taking suggestions, post them on my blog, send them to me, and write them on my wall. 

Here is to road we traveled in 2011, and the mountain we will climb in 2012!